God is Sovereign, Not Me

I was sharing with God last night that I try so hard to do everything right. I want to make sure I don’t miss anything, honor God with everything, not reap the consequences of mishaps or bad decisions. 

I realized that about myself again this morning when I wasn’t sure if I should grab the trail mix in the office because I was hungry or leave it because my body may not digest it well. I was actually really torn, because I was so hungry and it wasn’t near lunch time, but I was also nervous. But when I asked God if I should eat it, He reminded me that I don’t have to worry, that I am healed and that He loves me. In other words, eat it - you’re hungry. 

I think I’ve talked about this before - in a recent post about having so many choices - that I can worry about every little choice that I end up stressing myself out or possibly making myself sick. I don’t want to be like that anymore. I wonder if this is where discernment, wisdom, and living with no fear can help.

Wisdom can help us understand the options, discernment can help us decide which option is best, and living without fear allows us to make bold choices that are wise and honoring to God instead of worrying about what other people would think or if the devil would attack (that’s often the root of my worries and for that, Lord, I am sorry).

Even now, I’m debating whether to finish writing this or save it till later, dive into my lunch instead to get a break and to make sure I have enough time to finish (I’m sure you can tell by now that I’m currently writing this at my lunch break). I don’t want God to be disappointed in me if I neglect to keep up with this blog. I want to work hard for Him, not be lazy. But I also just want to eat and watch Rich House Poor House on YouTube. 

Hey, this blog is about honesty.

I know God will love me regardless, but will His Will be done in my life if I keep procrastinating or neglecting what He’s called me to do? It’s that question that causes me to overthink and want everything to be perfect. I want His Will to be done. But even as I’m writing this, I’m realizing that I’m forgetting He’s the One who’s sovereign and He makes His Will happen, not me. 

“…for it is God who is at work in you, both to desire and to work for His good pleasure (Phil. 2:13).”

Thank You, Lord, for helping me realize that. May You help me calm down and just trust You, in Jesus’ name, amen.

I’m going to eat my lunch now.




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