My Marriage Testimony

I met my husband on a dating app.

At the time, I was disgusted by dating apps. I thought it was full of men who just wanted to hook up or creepy men who couldn’t get a date in real life. It sounds harsh, but this truly was my mindset. 

I was trying to stay pure, meet the right, Spirit-filled, Christian man, and I thought there’d be no way I’d meet him on a dating app.

But when I asked God how I could possibly start dating in the middle of a pandemic when everything was shut down, He told me, “Meet people you wouldn’t normally associate yourself with.”

I was shocked, offended, curious. Who could that be? Anyone from college? An alumni group? I thought I’d want to meet anyone and everyone. I loved people. Who would I not want to associate with? I didn’t know what He meant, but I remembered what He said. 

Since God encouraged me to start being open to the idea of dating again after a heartbreak, I started looking up marriage testimonies on YouTube. You want to know what I found? Christian married couples who met on dating apps, from Tinder to Plenty of Fish. I was both surprised and encouraged, and I thought, Could this be God? Is this what He meant? 

So I gave it a try. Everything was shut down after all - what could it hurt? I started with Plenty of Fish since it seemed to be successful for that one YouTube couple (I couldn’t do Tinder - I just couldn’t). And that app - for me - was just as I had assumed: filled with hookup culture. Guys would see my pictures, I guess ignore my obvious gung-ho-for-Jesus profile, and slide in my dm’s. Not in a good way. 

On to the next app, I went. Christian Mingle. That had to be the place. It was full of Christians! But I soon realized these guys… um… didn’t really fit… my style, if you know what I’m saying. At least the ones I could see on a free subscription plan. 

But then my friend told me about Hinge, the app that’s “designed to be deleted.” It’s where she met her then-boyfriend, now-husband. I thought if it worked for her, I might as well keep going on this trend. 

After a few days on the app, a few guys messaged me, I messaged a few guys, but nothing was panning out so far. I did like the app better. I could filter to only show Christians and even see if they wanted kids or not, if they were drinkers or not, etc. Loved it! No more wasting time - I could get straight to the point.

Finally, I found a guy on there who I thought could be it. He enjoyed the outdoors, was a worship leader (like me, at the time), but when we video chatted, I realized seeing each other face to face makes a big difference. 

I was starting to lose hope. I asked God constantly to tell me right away if I should stop talking to a guy and to please let me not have to date all these men before finding the right one. I so badly did not want to be heartbroken again. 

And then I scrolled past a picture of a guy throwing leaves in the air in the middle of a forest. I thought, He seems nice. It’s hard for me to explain, but he reminded me of my high school. I felt like he would be like me, an “oreo.” (The black people know what I’m talking about.) He also, of course, wasn’t too bad on the eyes. I liked his smile and his glasses and his jacket and his smooth skin and… Okay, I’ll resist the urge to continue.

I clicked on his profile, confirmed his “Christian” status, and saw that we agreed on alcohol use, kids, and even our political stance. I had to message him then. So I shot him a message, introduced myself, said hi. I don’t really know what I said, but either way, he responded.

From there, we hit it off. It was so easy to talk to him. We both gave each other long messages, wanting to just talk to each other as much as we could. 

A week later, we set up a video call. I wanted to confirm that I would actually like the guy. I didn’t want it to be like the last one. We video chatted for about… oh… FOUR HOURS! And I enjoyed all of it and wanted to talk again. In our next video chat, we opened up, and I shared things I had never shared with anyone. He just made me feel that comfortable, heard, and… loved. Like, a Christian brotherly/sisterly love at that point, but still! 

A month later we met in person, and we were both pretty much sold. And a year later we were married! There you have it! God brought me to my husband in an avenue I never would’ve thought. 

I thought I would never find my husband on a dating app - not really - but I guess God is full of surprises.